Happy Birthday to Me

I did Filthy 50's for the first time on Friday. My time sucked at 40:38, but at least I could hit the standard. (I really think I should've done much better than that!)

Today, as a birthday present to myself, I ran a 5K this am. My time was 22:26--not a PR, but I loved the fact that the dude who blew past me in the last 100 feet was 68!!!

I also did "Nancy" today to standard. 5X for time of 400m sprint followed by 15 OHS at 65#. I did it in 18:55.

If there's one thing I'm certain of, it's that I keep getting stronger and better as I get older. No longer do we as humans have to dread aging!

My Mom once told me that life begins at forty. She is right.

Thank you to all of my friends, my coaches, my clients and all of those who have helped me or I have been able to help along the way. This is a beautiful journey we are traveling, and I am blessed to get to travel this with each of you.

Cindy PR!

Coolness.

I PR'ed on Cindy last week (AMRAP in 20 of 5 pull ups, 10 push ups, 15 squats--finally making it to 15 rounds.

8 rounds was all I could eek out 5 months ago, 12 rounds 3 months ago, now 15.

And what I really dig is knowing that I can do even better.

My heroes, Donna, CJ and Anel hold scores of 16, 19 and 19 respectively.

My friend, CJ, blows me away with how strong she is. She weighs 112 and can front squat 145.

The best thing about seeing that is KNOWING that I have so much room to grow.

I weigh 122 and my front squat just hit 120 recently.

Thank the gods my boyfriend loves a woman with muscles, cause I'm not going to stop lifting any time soon. This is more fun that Christmas!

Another thing I find interesting is that tearing (my hands) barely fazes me any more. It's more of a nuisance (and a pain in the ass while they are healing)than anything else. Even the thought of washing my hands used to send the fear of death down me. Now I'll just pick off the skin, pour on the "stingy" soap and get it over with already.

That's it. CrossFit just makes you tougher.

(By the way, this is an old "tear" pic. I only tore 2 very small ones this time.)

If You Don't Stand for Something....

Recently, I've had the opportunity to really be challenged regarding what I believe. Interestingly enough, this has occurred in many areas of my life. However, the one that stands out the most has been a challenge to "why I teach CrossFit".

I have a fitness Boot Camp. Although CrossFit based, it only incorporates 85-90% bodyweight only workouts, due to the fact that it is outside. I occasionally incorporate kettle bells, medicine balls (thanks, Eric and Vanessa!) and dumbbells, and we still have WOD's that vary in intensity and length--just like a "regular" CrossFit. We use zero barbells, and we don't do any of the power or olympic lifts, so it is not "truly" CrossFit, but otherwise, it is the same.

That being said, I teach what I have been taught.

With the exception of this ONE client, ALL of my clients have seen improvements across all 10 general physical skills to one degree or another.

This one client who didn't improve, ultimately turned against CrossFit and it's methodologies saying they were "unsafe" and "a fad."

This client (now ex-client) told me that dumbbells and kettlebells should only be used for curling and that machines in "Globo Gyms" enable him to do "standard" lifts.

He runs 2 5K's about 3-4x per week. And indeed, his most recent 5K was an improvement over his last one.

But so was mine...only I didn't run hardly at all. The ONLY running I did was a 5K 3 months prior (in which I also PR'ed), some running with my clients when our WOD's called for them, a few sprint workshops with Kristy or with my clients, and whatever 200, 400 or 800 meter runs any of the CrossFit WOD's I did in the last few months called for.

Additionally, I also improved my deadlift, backsquat, frontsquat, snatch, clean and jerk, press, bench press, max deadhang pull ups, max CTD push ups and max kipping pull ups during the same interim.

Yet this client is CONVINCED that CrossFit is junk. I even suggested he try a CrossFit that offers 100% of what is recommended (so he could experience the true strength training element), before he could pass judgement on such, but instead, he referred me to an article he read stating that CrossFit is a fad.

Funny.

The best thing this experience taught me was that I DO WHOLEHEARTEDLY BELIEVE IN CROSSFIT. It is a legitimate, proven program, and this gave me a great opportunity to defend it.

After going to Bally Total Fitness for TEN YEARS and running 2 miles almost daily, I could do ZERO push ups, ZERO pull ups and lift ALMOST ZERO weight when I found Team CrossFit Academy.

For me, the proof is so strong, it is irrefutable.

But much like the article Eric posted last week, it isn't for everyone.

And I'm okay with that.

Finally Managed "Karen" to Standard

Holy Moly.

It's funny how far I've come. It amazes me. I am proud.

Just a little more than a year ago, I so vividly recall a WOD with wallballs. I don't know what weight ball I had; I can only assume it was a 16 pounder. I do recall there was at least one set of 25 repetitions. I recall believing that doing wallballs was the single most difficult thing I had ever done. I watched all of the others in the class finish and go outside to do whatever else the WOD called for. I sat inside and struggled--wanting to cry and give up.

But something deep inside of me kept going.

More importantly, someone pushed me and believed I was capable of doing it. He kept insisting I could do things I never ever thought possible. And somewhere along the way, I started believing him.

Since then,I've achieved goals I set and then some. I continue to raise the bar for myself, and miraculously, I continue to reach even those seemingly star-high goals.

But I don't do it alone. I cannot.

It takes a village to raise a child, and it takes excellent coaches to raise an athlete. I think it also takes excellent competition, camaraderie and spirit which I are lucky to have found at TCFA.

What great joy it is to be alive!

Dreamin' Big

I want to go to the Games in 2010.

I am not the strongest. I have a long way to go.

But if I don't believe I can do it, I'm already done.

I am going to do this.

I am FIERCE, baby!

Bring on the OHS, GHD's, Double Unders, Muscle Ups and Handstand Push Ups! Bring on Fran, the bitch. Bring on WEIGHT.

I am ready to take this CrossFit thing to the next level!!!

"Feelin' Groovy"

God it's amazing what happens in life when you DECIDE to make a change, admit you have a problem, then DO something about it.

Funny how free I feel now that I finally allowed myself to "bare it all, baby!"

Recently, I started a Paleo Challenge that The Jer, Voltron and a few others challenged folks to. I quit dairy. I had already quit sugar and gluten, so that part was easy. I quit drinking (my own decision--not part of the challenge.)

It is truly amazing where life will take you if you let it.

Dairy, especially grain fed dairy, elicits an insulin response much like grains do, which is why it's not part of the Paleo diet. What's really interesting here, is that I had already given up dairy...EXCEPT for the cream I put in my coffee. Admittedly, I drink about 1/8 c. half n half per cup, and I drink 2-3 cups per day but when I gave this up, I have to admit, I noticed a pronounced difference.

I used to get sleepy right after I drank my coffee. I mean dopey sleepy. I got a noticeable insulin response, but I wasn't ready to do anything about it.

Coffee also, to some degree, elicits an insulin response. I am very very sensitive to insulin. I know I was heading towards diabetes when I gave up sugar and alcohol the first time, which is one of the reasons I quit. Robb Wolf mentioned that the AMA keeps raising the "rules" for what constitutes diabetes specifically so they don't have to admit that we are in the midst of an epidemic.

I'm thin; I'm supposed to be immune from all that!

Bullshit.

Anyway, giving up cream is putting me one step closer to "all day long nirvana." I eat, I feel good. I am feeling less and less exhausted after meals, unlike how I used to feel.

This is excellent.

August 31 is my new sobriety date.

Thanks to everyone for your support.

My Deal

It's been a long time since I've written on the blog. Truth be told, now that I'm in a position of "authority" (coaching a bootcamp and interning at TCFA), I've been a bit reticent to "let it all hang out" like I used to.

I've been censoring myself. "Should I say that?" "Does that sound unprofessional?" "Is that a bad thing to let others see?", etc.

FUCK IT!

I have discovered something about myself. Actually, I've always known this, but I'll say it loud and clear here: I NEED TO BE HELD ACCOUNTABLE TO OTHERS.

I LIKE for people to see my wins, my losses, my pain, my frustration, my anger, my angst. I NEED to at least feel that someone is paying attention, so that I can't get away with murder. I need to spill my guts. I need to tell on myself. I need to be allowed to be imperfect, and I don't care if anyone has a problem with that.

So there. I feel better getting that out.

Now onto the real reasons I need to write:

I AM RECOMMITTING TO SOBRIETY.

Once again, I don't care if you think drinking is awesome or you want to drink or you like to drink or you don't think I (or anyone else) needs to not drink. I don't.

"What's true for you, is what's true for you. It is what you have observed yourself."

YOU may be able to handle, beer, gluten, flour and dog poo for all I care. I CANNOT.

There are certain things that I allow myself from time to time--alcohol and sugar being two of them.

BUT...especially with alcohol it then becomes too much of a battle, and I have better things I'd rather think about.

Here's the deal. It's not that I have to drink, that I crave a drink (okay maybe a little) or anything like that.

It's that because I've spent so much of my life SOBER, I know how much better I can be without it, and the comparison of "before" and "after" pisses me off.

When I start allowing myself to drink on the weekends, my performance suffers during the week. My mood suffers. My drive to succeed suffers.

Sometimes it's only a little bit, but it's there. I KNOW THIS.

And I can't stand it any longer.

I can't stand watching myself become more interested in "relaxing with a beer" than running. I can't stand when I'd rather have a glass of wine than train.

I AM FIERCELY COMPETITIVE, AND I MAKE NO APOLOGIES FOR THIS.

And I can't stand to think I am losing my edge--even just a little bit.

SO I AM BACK ON THE WAGON AGAIN...BY CHOICE!!!!!

Because, dammit, I want to go to the games next year. I want to be competitive. I want to be better than I am. And for me, each time I say no to alcohol and sugar I get a little bit mentally tougher. Each time I don't give into those urges, I gain confidence and I PHYSICALLY feel better.

Truth be told, NOT DRINKING MAKES ME EDGY...and I LOVE taking that edginess and putting it into training. It's the same reason I enjoy a bit of self-denial in my food choices. I am in control. The food and alcohol are not.

Lots of athletes don't drink. Many coaches prohibit it during the training season.

This is something I WANT for myself.

There I said it.

I feel much better now.

I AM COMMITTING TO STAYING SOBER THROUGH MY BIRTHDAY, NOVEMBER 14TH, FOR STARTERS.